A Post By Any Other Name

Hey Gang!

Welcome to my life…

Where anything is possible and nothing is as it seems. I’m Freedom and I’ll be your host, coming at you from within…

The Depths of Geistopiaaaaaaaaaa

Velcum to my Life ees a prochect, un experiment een Life unt ART, A liwing storyboard, if you vill. Eet’s premise ees zat you can, and do, experience za life you choose. Eet ees based on za Veel of Life unt za ARTs for za New Millennium as life building tools. Ya. Eet’s true.

Welcome to my Life is an ITV Studios/Geist…House production. JustUs Productions, the parent company, would like to give a ‘Shout-Out’ to the following for their ongoing, and oft times unknowing, inspiration and support:

Princess Cuddlebug

Princess Sunshine

Craze & Co.

The Shaman

The Pillar

The Entire Putt-Putt-Putter Clan

FaeriePrincess

Berton

The VanMan (may he R.I.P.)

Osteen, the Son

Redds

Hoagie

Mudder

Mudslide Bill

Jojo Dancer

Senior Swankypants

The Socialite

The Cowboy

The Nameless One

The Ziatonic Antagonist

Otto

Prof. Siggy Chong

Pasturizer

Dancing Queen

Downtown Encyclopedia Brown

Mama Rabbit

And, of course, a very generous sponsor who pretends to want to be anonymous.

(There are a few of you I just don’t have nicknames for as of yet. Soon. Very soon.)

(*Semi-Legal mumbo-jumbo jargon fine print – my thoughts, my words. Bug off if you think you theivin’ them.*)

It is Monday, August 25, 2014. Time….????.

Oh God, You Devil

….

Ask & It Is Given

Feedback

Feedback has always been my favorite part of WTML, and also, the one I get to play with the least. I have long said that this is actually the most vital part of the project and have strongly encouraged folks to leave comments, questions and the like.

I think I have come to a defining moment in my life, quite literally. I feel it is better placed in Feedback.

Needless to say, a focal point of so many people, in and around my life, has been my ‘funk.’ What has caused it? What has dragged it out for so long? When will it change and what will it take?

For a long time, it was easy for me to accept that All Things Happen In Their Time and this would be no different. I could understand that if it wasn’t happening then perhaps I was waiting for something I had not yet conceived. I was waiting on the Universe to get all the pieces in play. So many thoughts, projects, notions have come across my desk, each requiring something I did not seem to have. Some, very clearly, needing others’ participation. many of these people are in my life now. I could point each and every one out. Yet, still nothing clicks.

So, I begin to wonder and ponder. The answer that most recently came to me is that I am no longer waiting on the Universe, but the Universe is waiting on me. I debated and deliberated for quite some time over this. (Longer than I shall admit.)

What is it I need to do or change? Some would say the change is needed in the ‘employment’ arena. I. myself, have ventured down that avenue of thought – time and time again. It has been a rocky road, to be sure. It’s also one I don’t wish to travel down again now. But, let’s just leave it with I have concluded that that was not the issue.

So then what?

In this past week, it has come to me that it was not an external thing, per se. It will become external now, but it was an internal thing that needed to transpire.

I have needed, for some time now, to step up to the plate and “own” myself. Know thyself…and to thine own self be true.

But what does that mean exactly?

As I rifled through my mental files, questioning what it is that needed to be addressed, only one thing kept coming up – my faith, my beliefs, my ministry. So many people have brought all three into question over the years. Perhaps even I have been one of those people.

I can look at this very blog and see how I have very often danced around my own beliefs, telling myself that I was protecting the sensitivities of others. So often, I have found myself the object of attacks and accusations simply because of what I believe.

Here, today, I am making it all very clear. I will, literally, spell it out. How you feel about it, and what you do with it from there is entirely up to you as the reader. I am choosing though to live it and wear it proudly. Perhaps not perfectly. I am human, after all.

Are you ready?

So let’s start at the top and work our way down.

First and foremost, I believe there is God and nothing else. For me, ‘God’ is simply the creative and driving force behind existence. Different people use different words to describe and explain this phenomenon. This is just the term that resonates with me best.

There is God and nothing else. To me, everything else is just frill. All of the religions, all of the philosophies, all of the stories and beliefs are just frill. At the end of the day they all point to the same thing – There is God and nothing else.

I, too, have my own frill – my own explanations of what it is, how it breaks down, and the way in which it works with us and through us. I will gladly expand on these thoughts for anyone who asks, but for now let’s leave it at There is God and Nothing Else.

The next topic of controversy is always The Bible. I enjoy The Bible. I believe that no matter who you are, or what you may believe, you can find a great deal of valid information in The Bible. I find it to be the most concise and complete definition of everything.

However, I will also be the first person to tell you that it can be a very dangerous book. It lends itself to very open and loose interpretations. I find people, sometimes myself included, easily fill in the blanks with information that is not actually there. It has been edited, changed, and messed with for centuries. Books have been removed, words mistranslated.

But, I would still swear by its potency and importance.

Next controversy – The Devil.

I do not believe in any such being and I will forever hold that there is no actual reference to any such thing in The Bible – based on history, culture and language. I will not delve into this any further here.

And, finally – The Divinity of Jesus.

This is some of that fluff and frill I mentioned earlier. Since the dawning of Christianity, this has been a topic of debate – even amongst Christians themselves. I say it is unimportant. From where I stand, it does not matter if Jesus was the Son of God or just a man. Neither changes nor influences the accuracy and importance of his teachings. ‘Ask and it is given’ is just as true whether it came from the mouth of a man or a god.

Thomas Jefferson, in regards to his own Bible that he was in the process of assembling, once wrote to a friend that he was removing all references to the Divinity of Jesus because he felt it was, “a distraction to the practice of true Christianity.”

I concur whole-heartedly. With this card in play, I believe we miss the actual teachings of Jesus. First and foremost, his teachings were geared towards telling us just what we could do and accomplish. By placing a God-head on him we simply remove any possibility of accomplishing these things. We make ourselves incapable of living up to this role model. But more importantly, I find that we spend so much time focusing on and debating such a concept that we very often condemn, and sometimes kill, those who do not believe as we do. Where is the Christianity in that?

Finally, I will not apologize for how I live or the things I do. I will make no apologies for my abilities to “read” cards, nor my powers of “healing.” I will not apologize for my ability to work with those of the Spirit realm. I will not excuse myself for speaking in riddles, or parables, or any other form of speech or tongues that one has difficult following.

I will not apologize for these things, because it is The Bible, in I Corinthians, that I am not only granted these gifts, but told that each is a gift bestowed on us by the “one Spirit.”

I think it is this last Statement of Self, that may be the most important. Over the years I have had people shun me, or even walk away from a conversation with me the moment they learned I was a reader or a Reiki practitioner. Mama herself had claimed to me that they were “evil and against God.” Yet, right there in black and white, it is all explained. So, I will not apologize for possessing these abilities. nor will I make excuses for just how good I am at them.

Now that I have come out of the ‘spiritual closet',’ let’s move onward and see where ‘My Life’ goes from here.

This past week was very interesting. (Notice I didn’t use the word ‘Intense.’) It started with past Monday. This was such a loss of a day. Though I suppose that is how you look at it. I was not nearly as productive as I had hoped. Yet, I was recovering from a very intense (yes, I used it on purpose) week with my children. We had vacation and what a vacation it was.

From Monday it was a return to life as usual. I went back to work, in my newest position, spent what allotted time I have with the Princesses and tried my best to get back into my routine. The latter of these was the most challenging.

First, I was finding that I just needed to unwind and release. Second, scandal up roared between me and Mama. Of course, this has been swelling for some time now. But this past week it most definitely came to a head. The final result of which is we will have to take it to the court. This was inevitable I suppose but I have been reluctant and resistant. I have had two main reasons for this. One – I really do not wish to put my daughters through whatever it is that comes next. Two – I really wanted a lawyer for this. I know what my complaints are but I wanted to be sure they came through as positive as possible and I didn’t want to plead a case with which I am so emotionally involved. (We all know I can get very impassioned.)

Sadly, there is no other recourse and my patience is exhausted. Needless to say, I won’t divulge specifics at this point. I’m certain that eyes are watching…and I wouldn’t want to spoil the fun.

It was actually within this episode that I stumbled upon this week’s Observation and Lesson. Now, perhaps folks will not agree with my interpretation of the events. To those folks I say, “Please see Feedback above.”

As I said, Mama and I had come to a head. We were running in circles with no progress. I was at wit’s end. Wednesday I had spent the day at work with my mind on the issues. I had accepted that I was in that “negative space” and was not handling things to the best of my ability. I had decided that perhaps I am too hard on Mama and needed to take a step back and re-approach. But, how do you correct something that has already gone so wrong?

I came home to an empty house and the opportunity to enter my Shamanic place. I wrestled with it for a few hours. I had finally made a promise to God that I would do my best to not be unnecessarily viscous towards her.

I return from the Shaman world to a text from Mama. it was viscous itself accusing my of lying and manipulating. It was a power play, plain and simple.

I went through the roof. I reached for the phone to text her back and I remembered my vow. I had gotten as far as typing, “You know…” (and sent that.)

I placed the phone down and went into panic mode. Along the way I had prayed and asked God for the perfect words with which to respond and promised to refrain until I had them. I started desperately seeking an outlet for venting before I blew my top. I even hunted down The Shaman to no avail. Suddenly, a friend came to mind. I texted her and said that I needed an angel to descend and intervene or I was going to tear into Mama. She asked me why and I only responded that she was completely unfathomable. Even in a dialogue with a third party I was doing my best to keep it on the level.

After I explained what was going on and shared the text that Mama sent, my friend replied. I read over the words. They were exactly what I have been trying to express to Mama for a very long time. They were exactly the words I needed. Ask & It Is Given.

I finally responded to Mama, taking care of business and the matters at hand first. Then I proceeded to tell her the story of my day and deliver the very words that God had sent me. I knew she wasn’t going to like them. They were very to the point. I was just as certain that she was not going to like my claim that the words came from God.

God knew this as well. God also knew that I would take great pleasure in sharing it all with her. Though it would grind her gears, the simple fact of the matter is that I told no lies and changed no information. Based on everything I believe there is no other explanation. So for me, it was double the pleasure, double the fun.

I not only was given the words with which to respond, but I had the joy of sharing a truthful testimony of God that I knew would grind her gears and fire her up. The thing is this – if God knew that it would go down this way, that I would share the words and the story leading to them, if he knew that it would all grind her gears, does it not stand to reason that that was God’s intent?

God loves us, each and every one. But, I have learned through experience that God does not mind, nor will not hesitate to, rub salt in our wounds if it is needed. Even God knows that, sometimes, we need a slap upside the head.

Oh God, You Devil.

Some may not like it, but that’s how I believe.

Now, before I close out this week, I want to go out on a limb.

I’m not generally one to challenge God, to ask for proof, or demonstration. I’m not one to make demands. But, as I come to this crossroads of my life, I find it necessary to put things out. After all, it’s the only way they could possibly come back.

I find myself in a predicament. It’s truly too soon to determine anything, but from where I sit the out look is not good. My position at work has changed. This is not a bad thing. In fact, in the long run, it could be the best thing that could have happened.

It is still part time, only 20-24 hours per week, but it is steady. Steady is the one thing I have not had for years. Over time, steady allows me to invest in other work – the work that requires some sort of money up front before getting paid. From there, over some more time, I can reach a plateau that has eluded me for so very long. It’s not an easy road, but it is one I can travel.

But, it seems like the switch may have come too little, too late. By the time all deals were made, hours were arranged and vacation was taken, it pushed back a steady flow of two weeks of pay until the middle of September. But, by then, so much is needed that at best, I will be treading water as opposed to staying afloat.

What boggles my mind is that I have a great revenue source – my ministry, the readings, healings, etc. but it is the one area of my life that has never managed to take off. It has always been there. It has always surfaced in times of need. But it has never been substantial enough to make a difference.

So what does the future hold?

Here is where I stand, and what needs I need to meet in the near future. The Bible repeatedly tells us that God provides. Jesus himself tells us that every day The Father feeds the birds and beasts of the wild. Every day God clothes the flowers of the field. And then he asks, “What makes you think you are any less than these?”

Over the next two weeks I will need a total of $283 to cover car insurance, Cuddlebug’s dance class and a pair of new shoes for two of those classes, and our Netflix subscription (which is truly my only entertainment.) The week after all of this, I must face Sunshine’s birthday – including presents and a party that she so desperately wants…and needs.

Before too long I am going to need to install a wood stove in the workshop. I can take care of the installation. It’s the $100+ for the stove and piping that are the issue. Not to mention $25 to file the much needed court papers.

September begins fundraising season – School, Dance, Rainbows, you name it, they want my money. I’m not griping, I just don’t know that I can help support any of them and this is a disappointment to me.

By the end of September I need to get the van inspected, and with the luck I have had with this beast who knows what that will involve. Of course, October begins the same cycle of monthly expenses. The end of October brings me Halloween, which of course brings costumes. Not to mention up to $200 for dance costumes.

I am in need of a wardrobe refresher – some pants, shirts, a pair of shoes. I think Cuddlebug herself may be in need of some socks and other ‘intimates’ before too long.

Currently, I have approximately $50. My gas tank is between a quarter and a half with a lot of driving to go. There is a pay due around Friday or Saturday.  Everything else is up in the air.

Now, I am always the first to admit that in my life “anything is possible.” Time and time again, when I least expect it, something turns up – very often from sources I never expect. So let us see how it unfolds. Let us see if God provides, if God works in mysterious ways. Let us see if one asks it truly is given.

(Lord, forgive me.)

From here in Geistopia, for now and for always, I am your beloved Rev. wishing you…

Love

Light

Peace

and Freakishness.