Trail’s End at the Trial’s Beginning

 

August 24, 2011

Hey Gang! Welcome to my life, where anything is possible and nothing is as it seems. I’m the Rev. Matt and I’ll be your host – coming at you from within the depths of Geistopia. Welcome to my Life is a project, an experiment in Life and ART. A living storyboard, if you will. It’s premise is that life is experiential and that you can, and do, experience the life you choose. It is based on the use of The Wheel of Life and The ARTs for the New Millennium as life building tools.

Welcome to my life is an I TV Studios/Geist…House Production. JustUs Productions would like to give a “Shout-Out” to the following for their ongoing and, oft times, unknowing, inspiration and support:

(All of whom I will spare you in this moment…bar one…)

A Very Generous Sponsor, who never really did want anonymity.

Well, folks, it has been a while since I have checked in with you, and I find it unfortunate that I must do so now with so much negativity and discord in the air.

As I have made known (not so subtly) on Facebook, Mama and I are at it. Full force. It is not good. It is not pleasant. And, unless there is a miraculous turn of events within the next week or so, we will find ourselves in court once more.

I could go on and on, citing example after example - incident after incident – as to how we got here.  I could give you a play by play description of everything leading to now.

However, that is not the point to this post. In fact, it is not my desire either. I do not wish to rehash this “crap” over and over again. Especially if I am going to have to do so for the court.

Instead, I wish to share with you the resolution. (Or at least, the resolution as it stands in this moment.) Resolution is a very loose term for there really has been none. The fight continues.

Tonight, it came to a head. And, unfortunately, it did so in front of the children. I did try to avoid this. I had sent the children into the house. I had given them instrucions before their mother had even arrived. They have been aware of the continuing fight that has been going on since last Tuesday. They do not know the details. They do not know what it has been about. But they do know it has been there. We have talked about it – very openly.

As a quick example…

Tonight when I told the girls that when their mother arrived it was important for them to stay in the house and not come out until I got them Makayla asked me why.

“Because your mother and I need to talk.”

“To fight?”

“No, actually, the opposite – to stop the fighting.”

But, Mama was not to talk. She, in very clear words, informed me that we would not talk tonight or any time. She went as far as to tell me she did not need to talk to me.

And that, in my opinion, is the core of the problem. She does not wish to co-exist. She does not wish to Co-parent. She wishes to fight.

And so a fight we shall have. But, for me, this is a fight to stop the fighting. For as you will read, I refuse to let my daughters grow up like this.

There is much backstory to the text that follows. I will not burden you with that now. Though, should someone wish clarification I will gladly share.

I ended up, after she had left, speaking my mind and saying my piece. I did this because she quoted the custody order, which does state that we should communicate through text or email. Since she does not have email, she received texts.

I had hoped to pull them directly from my phone, however, I seem technically inept in that department. So I will, word for word, letter for letter (including typos) transcribe them here.

I ask that you read this message (these messages) and give thought to them. I invite input and insight, for I am not above being wrong.

So, here is my resolve, as put to Mama, in this situation:

Well…since u don’t want to takl and u have no email…I hope ur ready for a whole lotta txtxs…cause I am telling you everything I had to say…right now…

First…the cops were just hwere. nice to see we’re all adults and cant resolve a “verbal argument” as they called it

1st…I am not Dan Hartzell and u r not driving me out of my daughters lives…and neither is ur grandmother

Next…what I wanted to talk to the girls about was a discipline problem U claimed to have in ur home and somehow blamed on me

They do their fair share of misbehaving here but its not tolerated. They get disciplined and they still do what they are told to do…as I told them yesterday and once before…

If I ever jear that they backtalk u they would answer to me the next time they came here. As I told them yesterday u r their mother and u need their help not their attitude

If their behavior truly is a problem then that is something we must deal with together…in a healthy manner. And it starts with both of us talking to them together

Searching for a solution…not placing blame

Moving on…u say many things that concern me and me wonder abut ur state of mind and r true concern for our children

And here I think it is important to stress OUR children. U keep referring to ur time with them. U need to be corrected. It is NOT ur time. Nor is it mine. It is THEIR time

It is not about u jess. It is not about me. It is about those 2 little girls.

Also, u told me that u would never be flexible or accommodating again. Sadly, that forces me into the same position.

U see their time with you is valuable…their time with me is rare. Now think about what ur proposing. If we’re not being flexible and accommodating then ur family will not be able to do things with them on weekends….

No parties, no fishing trips, no nothing. And u knowq that hurts jess?? Not u. Not our families. It hurts the children…they lose. For the next 14 years they lose.

I don’t know about you but I find that unacceptable. If u want to hate me please do. But also please stop taking it out on the children

U started all of this fighting. All of it. And u do that often. U start a fight but when its time to actually resolve u run away always angry

And somehow u make it all out to be my fault. Maybe ur always angry because on some level u know this nonsense is wrong

U jumped out of ur truck already fighting. I started calm. U fought. Now I cant speak for you but I know damn well that my daughters are not going to grow up like this

So if we cant find a way to work through our issues peaceably like adults then we must go to court. But this stops…now

If we have to go to court I will fight. If I must I will request court visits to both homes and psychological evaluations for the children

Because I truly believe that the mindset u hold today as well as that of ur grandmother are detremental to the mental and emotional well being of our children as well as their proper upbringing

I would never try to take them away from u but I will push for up to 50 percent of their time. Because I think they need more time with me

Theres a lot of behind the scenes u have no clue about. Now u have to ask urself…is this really what u want to put our children through

Or do u think we can grow up and act like real parents??

Oh…and I forgive u

So, there ya have it folks. What d’ya think? Comments? Suggestions? Prayers?

For now, and for always, from here in Geistopia, this is your beloved Rev wishing you Peace, Love, Light and Freakishness.