Say Whaaaat?

 

Monday, May 12, 2014

1958 (last hour)

I wanted to just check-in first. I have to clear myself and get my head in that “Spirit Space.” I do not know how long this will take, but I wanted to make note of when it started. Be back soon…

2015 (1st Dark Hour)

(In the background, music begins to play. Little dinny chimes accompanied by a steady stream of strings. A voice speaks.)

“Hold your breath. Make a wish. Count to three. (Singing) Come with me and you’ll be…in a world of pure imagination…”

And this is precisely where I wish I could go this moment.

The Shaman is beckoning from deep within the Hole. His enticing charms laying claim to my senses.

It is time to go now.

There is no turning back, once the ferry ride has begun.

I set sail many years ago. The coins of penance, very often, heavier than I could bear. I’ve learned in these travels that the Ferryman speaks very little. So, when he does, it is best to pay attention.

(Singing in the background) “…living there, you’ll be free. If you truly wish to be.”

I can see the shoreline from here. It could be a few days before we touch. I wonder which land this shall be. Perhaps we have finally reached the one for which we set off. There have been so many along the way. So many lands. So many realms. So many beings – human and otherwise.

(Singing in the background) “Together they would travel on a boat with billowed sail. Jackie kept a lookout perched on Puff’s gigantic tail.”

So very many…adventures.

(Singing in the background) “Noble kings and princes would bow whene’er they came. Pirate ships would lower their flags when Puff roared out his name.”

They tell you about the Ferryman, how he will take you down the river.They whisper of his ominous appearance and the price you must pay. Of this, all I can say is that the price is much greater than anyone care to imagine but the bounty is so rich, a succulent delicacy to be savored long after it has been tasted.

I think we all wonder what lies down that river…in the darkness. For as long as my people can recall there have been those brave enough to sound the horn. They would stand there on the dock so certain of themselves.

I imagine their hearts raced, much as mine did, when the fog began to roll in. Out of nowhere it arises and so swift it is upon you in a wink, a blink and a nod. It settles in so heavy that one can almost not breath, so dense that one can see not one’s own hand before him.

And then…his eyes. Those cold, lifeless eyes piercing through the thickness. They don’t glow as some stories may lead you to believe. They pierce. Almost as if they are piercing right into you, owning all of your hopes and fears…and deepest secrets.

You haven’t even seen his face yet (not that you ever do) and you know…you know that he owns your soul for the duration of the journey. Of course, the farther you wish to sail down the river the longer the journey will take.

So many hours pass. So many days in silence, watching him guide the ship…so patiently. So…lovingly. So effortlessly as if he and the river are one, I am quite certain that I have awoken in the middle of the night to him having a conversation with the water itself.

So many days in silence. And then BAM! He randomly hurls out some mutterance or another. And, he doesn’t seem to care if you heard him. So it is best to pay attention because I its usually a heads up of what is to come.

So often I have watched him, drawing in my mind what he must look like under that veil of shadows in which he hides. He is the man of 1,000 faces. And, no matter how many of them he shows you it always your own that you are gazing upon.

Many people have journeyed down the river. Many have returned with terrible and frightening tales of nightmarish beasts. Some have never returned at all. Perhaps they reached their shores.

Perhaps the beasts got them.

They do exist of course, the Beasts. The Ferryman and I have encountered many along the way. Ageless Spirits who guard the shores, lingering in the darkness. Waiting.

They will test you. They will tease you and taunt you and terrify you. But do not be fooled. This viciousness is but a ruse. Simply answer their riddle and solve their problem.

(Music in the background. A voice.) “How doth the little crocodile improve his shining tale and pour the waters of the Nile on every golden scale?”

Play their game. Entertain and humor them. Dilly-dally all the day long. Be courteous and kind and honest and sincere. Be true. But do not show them fear and most certainly do not disrespect them or they will destroy you.

They do not kill you. Oh nay! Nay they shall have you live so that you shall forget and they will leave you the scars with which to remember. And pain….pain so deep you think it will never cease.

I have earned quite a few of these scars myself o’er the past decade and a half. It’s hard to believe it has been that long.

(In the background another voice sings) “There’s no earthly way of knowing which direction we are going. There’s no knowing where we’re rowing or which way the river’s flowing. is it raining? Is it snowing? Is a hurricane a blowing? Not a speck of light is showing so the danger must be growing. Are the fires of hell a-glowing? Is the grisly reaper mowing? Yes the danger must be growing for the rowers keep on rowing and they certainly aren’t showing any signs that they are slowing…”

We have stepped on many a shore though. Appease them, these Daemons of the River. Satisfy their appetites with just a slight bit of your own flesh and they will share with you the riches of their lands. Riches beyond comprehension. Riches that no mortal man could lay his eyes upon lest their granting.

I can not read the Ferryman of late. It is true that he has been very direct and distinct, almost demanding, in his actions and though I do not know where we are I am certain that he does. He just will not say. Nor will he tell me what lies around this next bend.

He whispers nothing of the shores ahead. Not even to the waters. He is plotting and planning. He is calculating something and I have no idea what it could be. I have seen this behavior before just never quite this intense…and intent.

I’ve learned that, at times like these, it is best to just lie back and watch the world pass by. Let the Ferryman ferry. (Just pay attention in case he needs you.)

2147 (3rd Dark Hour)

…….

2159

(Music and Singing in the background) “Up where the smoke is all billowed and curled, tween pavement and stars is the chimney sweep world. Where there’s ‘ardly no day and ‘ardly no night there’s things half in shadow…and ‘alf way in light.”

So it has been a very intensive journey of late. Things are shifting…a lot. I’ve been feeling it for some time. I have heard the whispers on the wind and I can smell it in the air. It has just been getting stronger with each passing day. There is magick afoot and ‘times they are a-changing.’ I do not know what that means.

I only know I feel it.

Tonight it is very cellular. I can feel my body shifting from deep within. so much in fact that no substance is satisfying me. no food, no drink, no anything. Even water quenches me not.

My head is spinning and pounding all at the same time. I feel as though I am melting away.

Life has been a frenzy lately. I almost awed and speechless. I am quite literally standing on the flip side of four months and I am not real sure how I got here.

And I can not continue tonight. I must rest now.

It is time to close my eyes, sleep the sleep of the just and drift away into that Neverland of Eternity where mayhaps there are some answers to be found. (Or at the very least some comfort.)

By the God’s’ graces may I return tomorrow with tales of splendor, healing and redemption.

I know the change is coming. I do not know when nor from where. I can not tell if it “good” or “bad.” Or, more aptly, both. But then that begs the question what is the bounty and what is the price that must be paid.

The greater the reward the greater the sacrifice.

Just what, exactly, lies ahead.

(And where the hell is it hiding?)